


The Ontological Argument

by yotoob



Category: Killing Eve (TV 2018)
Genre: F/F, Who's to Say, smut with feelings?, smut with oi oi?, smut with philosophy?, very much just smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-14
Updated: 2019-05-14
Packaged: 2020-03-05 09:55:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18826309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yotoob/pseuds/yotoob
Summary: It's a flawed argument from the start





	The Ontological Argument

**Author's Note:**

> possible spoilers for 2x07 but let's face it that's probably just wishful thinking
> 
> Shout out to the show writers for inserting my favourite theodicy into my favourite show - love you guys xo

“You’re behaving as though… you’re working for him.”

Eve says it flatly, looking down a discarded magazine on the table top rather than looking at Villanelle. It’s warm enough in this apartment that Villanelle has been given, but Eve is still wearing her oversized coat, bundled up against a non-existent chill.

Villanelle feels impatient, that familiar and near permanent feeling. Not now, later. Not now, soon. Not now, not now, not now, just wait, just wait.

It’s her Id fighting her Super Ego, again and again, even though Freud can literally go fuck himself.

She angry, realises. Angry that somehow, despite that fact that she and Eve are now orbiting each other with a near terminal collision trajectory mapped out, Eve still hasn’t even given her the slightest hint of affection, asides from one hand to the cheek, a mockery of concern.

Villanelle shrugs.

“Maybe I am. Maybe I like him.”

Eve scoffs a little at the magazine, and then seems to have a second wave of thoughts, because she stops abruptly and gapes at Villanelle from across the room. Good.

“You like him… you hit him across the face with a book?”

Villanelle shrugs, enjoying herself now.

“Maybe that’s the sort of thing that really gets me going, Eve. Maybe that’s how I like to play.”

“He was trying to bully you?”

“So?” Villanelle shrugs with one shoulder. “It didn’t work. And he knows me better than you. He didn’t expect me to have working knowledge of the Ontological Argument, for example. And he will give me things that I want, if I work for him.”

“What do you want?”

“Tcch, you know. Nice life, fun job, etcetera etcetera. You are giving me _nothing,_ even though you _promised…_ ”

“What did I promise?”

“Everything. You said I could have everything. And so far, you have given me nothing, except a briefing on the Ontological Argument, most of which was _wrong_ , by the way-”

“How do you know it was wrong, if you don’t know anything about it?”

Villanelle scoffs.

“What kind of idiot doesn’t know the Ontological Argument?”

Eve stares at her. Villanelle stares back, eyebrows raised.

“ _If we can conceive of a perfect being, then that perfect being necessarily must contain the value of existence, otherwise it is less than perfect_ … hmm, I did not translate that well, it sounds better in Russian…”

Villanelle trails off, suddenly unsure of herself. 

Eve looks at her, and Villanelle is burning up with every centimetre of distance, because she doesn’t _need_ Eve, she doesn’t, but she’s just _there_ , and Villanelle feels like she’s owed some affection, surely? She’s earned _something_ by now, surely.

She rallies.

“Are you going to try and kiss me now? Because you’re worried about whether I’m still a loyal asset? Because you’re jealous of Aaron? Or did Carolyn tell you to come here and make nice?”

When Villanelle looks at Eve again, she can tell that she’s hit closer to the mark than she had expected. 

She sits back on the bed, anger curling inside her, because why can Villanelle never have a perfect moment? Why must it always be tainted with-

“Wow. _Wow_. Seriously? Carolyn is pimping you out? This is all just _work_ to you is it?”

“It’s not like that-”

“Then come over here and _fucking_ sit on me, if that’s how it is.”

Eve swallows. 

It doesn’t count, Villanelle thinks. If she kisses me now, it doesn’t count. This isn’t real. This is her job. So don’t… don’t-

Eve is frozen by the table. Villanelle stares at her, challenging.

_Don’t forget. Don’t lose yourself in it. In her._

“Come on then.” Villanelle pats her knee, mocking her. “Come and earn your pay cheque. Or are you so bad at your job that you can’t even follow direct instructions from Carolyn-”

“Carolyn did _not_ send me to-”

“Oh please.”

“Why are you being like this?”

“Because it’s what you _want_ , isn’t it?” Villanelle almost spits it out, furious with the never-ending coyness, with Eve’s reluctance. “Is it so terrible to want me, Eve? That you will not fucking just kiss me unless you have a direct order as an excuse to hide behind? Thank god for Carolyn- did she buy you some lingerie, or does the budget not stretch that far?”

“Fuck you.”

“Yes, _jesus_ , I’ll have it this way if you refuse-”

“Refuse what?”

“Refuse to like me because you _like me!_ ”

Villanelle abruptly realises that she’s shouting. And then she realises that her eyes are full of tears, and fuck, honestly, why is it always like this?

Eve looks away from her.

“I fucking hate what you have done to me.”

“Good. Fuck. You think this is going well for me?”

“Are you wearing anything under that robe?”

Villanelle looks down at herself.

“No?”

“I messaged you to tell you I was coming by, and you didn’t put any clothes on?”

“No, I took them off.”

Eve stares, and Villanelle feels herself become wet.

“Jesus, okay, Eve you need to go, or you at least need to be willing to watch me touch myself, because-”

“Does it turn you on? Arguing?”

Villanelle shrugs, biting her lip against the sensation of the silk against her body.

“Not always. With you, yes, but then I’ve yet to find an interaction with you that-”

“It turns me on.”

For some reason, Villanelle’s brain supplies “Jesus, poor Niko”, before Eve marches across the room, slaps her once across the face, and then fucking sits on her.

It’s a fight not to moan instantly, and Villanelle hisses instead, her cheek stinging.

“Am I going to need a safe word? Do we not need to lay out some ground rules here before-”

“Why the fuck are you-”

“Rule one, please take off your fucking coat.”

“I hate you so much some times-”

“Eve, will you just fucking kiss me-” Eve grabs her face before she can finish the final two words, and then her mouth is against Villanelle’s, and she’s kissing her hard with no preamble.

Villanelle opens her mouth to her automatically, and then Eve’s tongue is against hers, and Villanelle does moan this time. She slides her hands underneath the fucking coat, furious with it’s existence, and Eve drops her arms back, allowing Villanelle to push it off her shoulders and cast it to the floor.

Any small feeling of victory is lost, however, because when Eve’s hands return to her body they’re pulling Villanelle’s robe aside until _jesus_ , okay, those are her tits.

“Jesus” Eve says, and breaks the kiss, looking down at her hands, which are now cupping Villanelle’s breasts in a way that seems to have thrown Eve as much as it’s thrown Villanelle.

Villanelle swallows. Removing all her clothes before Eve arrived had seemed like a power move at the time, but now-

“I did say that I didn’t have anything on underneath-”

“I know, but I didn’t think you were being serious-”

“Yeah well, believe it”

Eve is staring at her hands. Villanelle can’t breath.

And then Eve moves her hands, repositioning until her thumbs are brushing over Villanelle’s nipples in a way that has Villanelle gasping and straining against the air.

Eve licks her lips, and then bites her lips, and then leans in to bite at _Villanelle’s =_ lips, and if this is all just so that Eve can earn a promotion Villanelle really doesn’t care, Eve can have her, just let her fuck her, please-

“Lie back” Eve instructs, low and impossibly sexy. 

Villanelle tries to counter.

“Take off your top.”

Eve leans away from her, holding eye contact for a long moment, before getting off Villanelle’s lap.

And then she starts to undress herself.

Villanelle is shifting away from her, biting her lip to avoid moaning as she slides backward, because the eye contact is almost ruining her.

When Eve is down to her underwear, Villanelle stops her.

“Wait… the rest I want to take off myself.”

God, she looks good. Villanelle wants to put her mouth all over her, taste every part-

Any feeling of dominance is swept away when Eve comes crawling up the bed to kneel above her, and then undoes the tie of her robe with one certain hand.

Villanelle has never… felt this before. The nervousness in bed. It’s never been something she understood, but now she’s lightheaded with it.

She cranes upward, grabbing the back of Eve’s neck to pull her mouth onto hers. She wraps her free hand around Eve’s wrist, and guides her hand towards the heat between her legs.

Eve swears, cups her once through the robe, swears again, and then nudges the robe aside until it is palm on skin. Villanelle rides her hips upwards, lacking any kind of control.

“Fuck, baby-”

Eve groans to herself, and then suddenly there’s a rhythm to work against, and Villanelle is finding it hard to breath again.

Eve is kissing her, mumbling out expletives directly into her mouth, as Villanelle spreads her legs wider and buries her hands in Eve’s hair.

“Eve, god- fuck me, jesus, please fuck me _oh my god-_ ”

Eve moves her mouth away from Villanelle’s, and looks down their bodies for a moment. When she looks back at Villanelle, it’s as though she can’t completely believe what her hand is doing.

Villanelle’s eyes roll back in her head for a moment when Eve drops her head, and now her mouth is on Villanelle’s breast, and its a heartbeat from painful but just so fucking _good_ -

“God Eve, god-”

Eve repositions herself, and then her hip is behind her hand, and this time when Eve fucks down into her it’s with her whole body against Villanelle’s, and Villanelle is going to come, if there was any justice in the world this should have lasted hours but she knows she’s got bare seconds before-

“Carolyn didn’t give me an order-”

Villanelle is gasping, and then laughing, because the notion of trying to hold a conversation-

“What-”

Eve moans, and Villanelle feels herself clench around her fingers once.

“It wasn’t an order-”

“Eve, please-”

“It was permission. To do what I wanted.”

“What-”

Eve seems to lose the strength from her arm, because she drops herself down until her mouth is next to Villanelle’s ear, whispering hot and heavy.

“You. I wanted you, I always want you-”

Villanelle moans, and she doesn’t care if it’s lies, she doesn’t, she doesn’t-

When she comes, she swears she can hear Eve whisper.

“Sorry baby…”

…..

**Author's Note:**

> SPONSORED BY ANSELM - WHAT A GUY
> 
> sorry to anyone on their morning commute
> 
> @yotoob on twitter
> 
> (also sponsored by some loser in brazil omg)


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